Thursday, August 4, 2011

I have a confession...

...so when I've been using the ovulation predictor tests, I haven't been waiting the recommended time limit before reading them. You're supposed to wait 5 minutes, but usually I wait a max of about 2 (sometimes less!), look at it, and the control line is SOOO much darker than the test line, I just figure there's no way it could be positive, and throw it out. Well, last night, around 7 p.m., I took one, and waited the full 5 minutes. It was ALMOST positive! I'm pretty sure I was catching my surge on the way back down though, as this morning my temp was up. Fertilityfriend.com shows me ovulating on CD15 based on my temps, but I think it was actually CD17. Mostly because on CD15 and CD16, there is not a significant rise, and we usually use 2 fans but one was broken those nights. Actually it was broken last night too, but I would consider my temp today a more significant rise. Oh well, I won't know for sure until a few more mornings of temping, and my bloodwork on Monday should confirm it if I really ovulate... but I'm feeling really positive about it!

Speaking of being positive about things, yesterday I was listening to KLOVE radio. Lysa TerKeurst from Proverbs 31 Ministries (proverbs31.org) was talking about how children always seem to want what they want, when and how they want it. And sometimes that isn't what's best for them. We do the same thing with God. We get in our head that we want something NOW, and forget to wait on His perfect timing. It really made me think about stuff, because I think that's what I've been like with this pregnancy thing. Even with the clomid. I'm seriously like "we NEED to get pregnant THIS month", because after that I don't know how we're going to get any kind of insurance to pay for anything. But if I'm trusting God to provide, then if He gives us a child/children, I know He will cover the expenses in some way. I need to trust His timing, instead of relying on my limited experience and thought processes and obsess over my own desires.

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